[lemonadelife_blog]

Food is my enemy. It is also my friend. Perhaps that’s a contradiction, but for most people, I think this is an accurate representation of the struggle food has become in our society and moreso for those with diabetes.

I can’t sit here and type that I am “moderate” when it comes to my carbohydrate intake. I can’t write that I prefer vegetables and eat healthy and organic. I certainly can’t say that try to maintain a certain “level” of carbohydrates each day.

Sometimes I think that if I didn’t eat carbohydrates that I would be thinner, and consequently happier. But I love things that are made of carbohydrates, and so its difficult to actually picture myself happier without macaroni and cheese, pasta, cheesecake, or heck, even a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I love french toast and I love ice cream. I love cupcakes and cheesecake and regular cake. I’ll admit, carbs are tasty little bastards.

I know that I need to practice moderation more. This is challenging for me, because I love food. I love the way it smells, I love the way it tastes. I even love the way it looks. Moderation is important but I’m not going to sit here and lie to you and tell you I have figured out how to each a healthy, balanced moderate diet of carbohydrates, vegetables and protein. I haven’t.

I’m getting married next year, and weight has become an even bigger issue for me. But I have spent almost twenty-five years eating a particular way. It’s difficult to get out of that groove. But it’s important, and so I am trying, slowly, to exercise a bit more and to eat a little less (or at least, eat a bit better). Some days I am excellent. Other days I suck.

But as with most things in life, I am a work in progress. And I’m OK with that.


Filed under: Diabetes, Food, Identity

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